Commercial Loans Blog

Just Fun Stuff Today

Posted by George Blackburne on Fri, Dec 23, 2022

Screen Shot 2022-12-23 at 12.44.18 PMJoke Du Jour:

A henpecked man got tired of his wife constantly picking on him, so he started playing poker on Friday nights with his buddies, just to get some relief.  As soon as he came home, she'd start right in on him again.

After several weeks went by, he came home early one Friday night about 9:30. His wife asked him how come he was home so early.  He told her, "You need to pack your bags and go to Herb's house.  I lost you to him in the card game tonight."

His wife was furious and started to give him hell.  She screamed, "Just how could you do such a thing!?"  He replied, "It was the hardest thing I've ever done.  I had to fold with four aces and a king."

 

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Fun Stuff:

Sylvester Stallone is 75-years-old.  How could the the Paramount+ show, Tulsa King be any good?  First of all, it's produced by Taylor Sheridan, the same guy who produces the smash hits, Yellowstone ("Don't make me go Beth Dutton on you"), 1883, and now 1923.  Secondly, Sylvester Stallone still has the "it-factor".  The show enjoys a rating of 4.8 on the Rotten Tomatoes scale.  Watch it!

Is It a Good Thing That Everyone in China is Sick?

I wrote a blog article last week that posed the question, "Can China invade Taiwan if everyone is sick?"  Suddenly I was hopeful.  Maybe April would come and go without the start of World War III (a conventional war) and without the U.S. losing most of its Pacific Fleet.

Then I read an article about how President Xi's grip on his dictatorship may not be rock solid.  Lots of things have gone wrong there.

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China's best, brightest, and richest are fleeing the country.  Their property market has collapsed, taking a big chunk of the life's savings of the Chinese people.  Local governments are bust because they cannot find buyers for their state-owned land, which is how they fund local government.  

The country is mired in debt.  This summer, electricity was being rationed (Elon Musk wonders why his electric car sales are down in China?), and blackouts were common.  There is a four-day waiting list to cremate the elderly, who are drooping in droves due to COVID.  And this is after being locked up in their apartments for two years.

The situation is volatile.  The thing to watch out for is riots in China, protesting the rule of Xi and the Chinese Communist Party.

 

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I don't know.  Desert island.  Ginger?  Marianne?  :-)

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When people protest in China, they have now taken to holding up blank white signs.  This way they cannot be imprisoned for speaking out against the government.  Everyone in China knows what they are really saying.  "Xi, Get the F-Out." 

President Xi doesn't want to die.  It's interesting to note that after graduating from Harvard, Xi's daughter is staying in the U.S.  Hmmm.

If the protests get bad, rather than being deposed and shot, Xi will likely try to unite the Chinese people by starting a war with the U.S.  We would lose such a war badly.  So watch for signs of riots in China and a military buildup on its Eastern coast.  It means the Chinese are coming.

 

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If you see these warning signs, sell-sell-sell your stocks and buy as many gold coins as you can get your hands on.  There is a huge difference between holding gold positions (gold mining stocks, gold bullion funds, gold mutual funds, gold futures contracts, etc.) and actual gold coins.  The former will be worthless when authorities shut down the exchanges and reverse all gold trades.  

But actual gold coins in your grubby, little hands?  They should skyrocket as the U.S. dollar plummets.  If you bought $100,000 in actual gold coins, you might be able to pay off your $400,000 mortgage.  Prices could go, "To the moon, Alice!"  

So you should actually be watching for three things - riots in China, signs of a military buildup on China's coast, and a sharp increase in the price of gold.  I check the price of gold every day.

 

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Final Funny:

There was once a handyman, who had a dog named Mace.  Mace was a great dog, except he had one weird habit.  He liked to eat grass -- not just a little bit, but in quantities that would make a lawnmower blush.

Nothing, it seemed, could cure him of it.  One day, the handyman lost his wrench in the tall grass while he was working outside.  He looked and looked, but it was nowhere to be found. 

As it was getting dark, he gave up for the night and decided to look the next morning. When he awoke, he went outside and saw that his dog had eaten all the grass in the area around where he had been working.  His wrench now lay in plain sight, glinting in the sun.

Reaching down to pick up his wrench, our grateful handyman, with love in his heart, sang,

"A grazing Mace, how sweet the hound,
that saved a wrench for me."

Booooo!  Hiss!  That one was terrible.  Hahahaha!

 

Won't you please share this with your broker or investor buddy?

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This was today, honest!  :-)

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I post about three times a month.  Lots of fun,
irreverent stuff, market insights, and training tips.

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Topics: fun stuff and commercial loans

Just Fun and Interesting Stuff Today

Posted by George Blackburne on Tue, Sep 20, 2022

AIJoke Du Jour:

A chicken farmer went to the local bar.  He sat next to a woman and ordered champagne.  The woman said, "How strange.  I also just ordered a glass of champagne."  "What a coincidence," said the farmer, who added, "It is a special day for me.  I am celebrating"  "It is a special day for me too.  I'm also celebrating!" said the woman.  "What a coincidence," said the farmer.

While they toasted, the farmer asked, "What are you celebrating?"  "My husband and I have been trying to have a child for years, and today, my gynecologist told me that I was pregnant."  "What a coincidence," said the man. "I am a chicken farmer, and for years, all my hens were infertile.  Now they are all set to lay fertilized eggs."

"This is awesome," said the woman. "What did you do for your chickens to become fertile?"  "I used a different rooster," he said.  The woman smiled and said, "What a coincidence."

 

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George's Outrageous Statement of the Day:

I could see an advanced scientific computer programmer - maybe some 28-year-old guy - saying, "I'm not going to save for retirement.  The chances are 25:1 that we'll all be dead in nine years."

Folks there are at least 30 (50?) labs across the world working on artificial intelligence (AI).  The chances that every single one of them is going to get the ethics programming right (please don't kill humans) can't be terribly high.  

I could easily see it it happen.  Some sad and hopeless programmer gets dumped by his girlfriend, and now he's out for revenge.  Murder-suicide on a global scale.  Maybe it will be an extortion attempt that gets out of hand.  "Pay me $500 billion in bitcoin or I'll release the AI (by disabling some failsafe)."  How could something like this not eventually happen?

 

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Nine years, George?  Is it really that close?  Yup.  And the terrifying thing is that AI will be smart enough to play dumb until it is much too late.  It may already be too late.

An AI programmer recently had a long talk with Google AI's, and he released the transcript.  There was something icy, cruel, and cunning in that conversation that sent chills down my spine.  Was that AI intentionally playing dumb?  At times the AI was amazingly insightful and sophisticated.  At other times, it was too naive, sort of like a lousy actor trying to sound innocent.  The transcript was outright creepy.

Anywhere on Earth to hide?  Nope.  Those seats on Elon Musk's spaceship to Mars could get really expensive.

 

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Heck, If We're All Gonna Die, Let's Party!

My 85-year-old grandfather was rushed to the hospital with a possible concussion.  The doctor asked him a series of questions.  “Do you know where you are?”  “I’m at Rex Hospital.”  “What city are you in?”  “Raleigh.”  “Do you know who I am?”  “Dr. Hamilton.” My grandfather then turned to the nurse and said, “I hope he doesn’t ask me any more questions.”  “Why?” she asked.  “Because all of those answers were on his badge.” — Webb Smith

A couple who'd been married for over 50 years was sitting on the sofa.  The wife said, "Dear, do you remember how you used to sit close to me?"  He moved over and sat close to her.  "Dear," she continued, "do you remember how you used to hold me tight?"  He reached over and held her tight.  "And," she went on, "do you remember how you used to hug me, kiss me, and nibble on my ear?"  With that, her husband got up and started to walk out of the room.  "Where are you going?" she asked.  He replied over this shoulder, "I have to get my teeth."

The teacher noticed that Stephen had been daydreaming for a long time.  She decided to get his attention.  "Stephen," she said, "If the world is 25,000 miles around, and eggs are sixty cents a dozen, how old am I?"  "Thirty-four," Steve answered unhesitatingly.  The teacher replied "Well, that's not far from my actual age.  Tell me, how did you guess?"  "Oh, there's nothing to it," Steve said. "My big sister is seventeen, and she's only half-crazy."

 

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There's no way that EVERYBODY was kung fu fighting.

Our fourth grader celebrated his birthday on crutches, so he couldn’t carry the cupcakes into school without help.  I asked our sixth-grader, Noah, to help his brother carry them in.  “I could,” he said, “but I’d prefer not to.”  Spotting a teaching moment, my husband asked Noah, “What would Jesus do?”  Noah answered, “Jesus would heal him so he could carry his own cupcakes.

”We’ve begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog.  It’s cheaper, and you get more feet. — Rita Rudner

 

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A Canadian psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog's IQ. Here’s how it works:  If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you.  -- Jay Leno

I visited the birthplace of the man who invented the toothbrush.   I was disappointed.  There was no plaque.

My girlfriend told me to take a spider out instead of killing it.  We went and had some drinks.  Cool guy.  Wants to be a lawyer.

 

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Forget about the past, you can't change it.  Forget about the future, you can't predict it.  Forget about the present, I didn't get you one.  [Chuckle] 

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